Playboy Helps Fund Coralsprings.com

White Bread community has some seeds in it after all

 

Many of the citizens of Coral Springs do not realize just how  ‘White Bread’ of a  community we really have here.  ‘White Bread’  meaning prude, conservative, a place where George Carlin would get sneered at.    I am actually getting email that some citizens are upset about the fact that we have a link to Playboy on our website. Can you believe that? Well I can. You don’t realize that within our community there are people that are willing to remove the last bastion of ‘Manism’ (if there is such a word) from within our community, If  we let them get away with it, then what next? No booze? You can’t buy booze in this city on Sunday until 1:30 p.m.No smoking?…hay wait a minute. They took away that right last year. They also took away our right to buy a gun at Wal-Mart even though you can buy all you want at  K-Mart.  That doesn’t make sense.  Soon you won’t be able to cuss! Shit! Our city commissioners are spoiling everything for us honest folk. They should move to California where they belong! 

Since we lost our funding from the city due to the fact that we were scumming out the mayor and the city commissioners (Alan Polin where are you) we had to resort to extreme measures in order to pay our non-existent payroll.  I even had to fire me. It was not a pleasant thing for me to do and I can’t forgive myself as a result. Bastard that I am. The only source of possible funding was to advertise Coral Springs Businesses who , as I found out quickly, are all cheap bastards that won’t spend a dime. Listen, in a town that can’t even keep a Golden Corral  Restaurant in business, what d’ya expect! So that’s why we had to bring in a network of affiliations and link to those sites that will pay us for you to do business with them. Dumb Bastards. No one in Coral Springs buys things on line…except from Playboy! I am happy to report that Playboy is keeping us afloat due to your generous donations to their online store! You are making me proud to say I live in Coral Springs, the ‘Premier City to work, live and raise a family’. Great slogan from our city commissioners if it wasn’t a bunch of horse doo doo. (translation: Shit).

 

How do we make this money to pay the bills? Simple. You click on one of the ads on our page, buy something and we get a few pennies. What ever you do, don’t click on it now because it will take you to the playboy site and you won’t read the other stuff that I have to say. 

If you are reading this then that means that you didn’t click on the Playboy ad and that you actually want to hear what I am saying. Or, you are one of those White Bread people that want to find other damaging evidence so that you can have me expelled from the city. Read on please….

What this city really needs is an enema. A nice cold one.  We need more police protection because we don’t take the time to learn more about our neighbor. When we do , we find that our neighbor turned out to be Mohammed Attah, as in the  case of the dumb shmucks that even invited him to a party the night before he flew the plane into the world trade center.  I mean when he was at the party that night, and he gave you his cat, what were you guys thinking? You see, that is what I am talking about. White Breaders not willing to find out about their neighbor, but interested in sending me KKK style hate mail.

 

Did you know that there is no law against having an Adult Nude Facility in Coral Springs? They forgot about that one. There is law saying that your dog can’t dump on someone’s lawn without you picking it up, but no law that says your neighbor can’t strip in a club in Coral Springs.  You see , it is a zoning issue. You can have one of these places but it has to be 5000 feet away from  a school.  That’s the catch. Schools are everywhere in Coral Springs. It was a conspiracy! The City Commissioners lead by Maureen Burk conspired to make certain about that.  They even placed one in the sports park . That completed the grid to make sure that no strip club can be built anywhere, even out near the expressway. . Now what’s a sports park for anyway if you can’t have a little fun?

So it’s like this.  Coralsprings.com remains the only independent thinking website in South Florida being funded by White Breaders that don’t want strip clubs in their city but are willing to buy things from Playboy.

What a strange place we live in…

Have something to day? email us at  editor1@coralsprings.com

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Author: HelpMeHoward