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What the hell happened to all those Shark Attacks?

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Have you noticed that ever since September 11th, no shark attacks have been reported in the State of Florida? What happened? Did the Sharks decide that the threat of biting someone with Anthrax was too great so they decided to go after regular fish? Rumors have it that the Coral Springs Chief of Police has his department checking out whether the shark attacks were really related to Mohammed Atta . A theory suggests that the terrorists in their search for other ways to attack the United States might have trained the sharks and were experimenting with them prior to the attack on the WTC. They do that with dolphins. I know as I used to watch ‘Flipper’.  Just to set the record straight, there were more people killed from shark attacks over the last 50 years than Anthrax.

What happened to the ‘War on Drugs’? That was supposed to be the big one. No one talks about it anymore. An email sent to me indicated that the cocaine and crack supply coming in from Colombia was infested with Anthrax. The email said that Osama Bin Laden bought into the enterprise a few years ago and planned to contaminate the drug supply with anthrax. Obviously, with the current drug problems in America, such a move would kill many people. I am surprised that the News Media didn’t report on this one. They are reporting on everything else that is as kooky.

What happened to Chandra Levy and Gary Condit? Is she still alive? I wonder if Gary is still running for office.  I wonder why the media never checked out the connection of the terrorists and Gary Condit. I am not suggesting that he is a terrorist, but it is to his fortune that the attention of the public is no longer his way. He can thank the media for that one. They are too busy discussing if they are really responsible for the Anthrax Panic that they created . Maybe Condit is really behind those envelopes. Maybe not.

To make matters worse, O.J. Simpson is on trial for beating someone else up and the News Media isn’t showing it, Live!. He’ll probably get off the hook over some technicality. Didn’t you know? He really didn’t kill Goldman and Nichol. According to the jurors, these 2 people stabbed themselves to death…160 times. Isn’t it odd that this is very similar to what the Taliban and those that support terrorism are saying. The U.S. attacked the WTC themselves. Or was it the Israelis? Maybe it was OJ Simpson. At least he would have gotten away with it.

Things have really changed in America. Maybe I’ll go for a swim in the ocean. I hear that it is a lot safer there ever since September 11th.

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Howard Melamed

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